Ralph Snart Trading Cards No. 26
Text from card back:
Ralph quits NOW Comics and tells his agent Sal that he wants to be a syndicated comic strip and make beg bucks. Back at his apartment, Ralph's super-hero girlfriend Supernympho hassles him to marry her. Soon he signs a contract with Dork Features Syndicate and learns that they have the right to kill him if he quits! Ralph is disgusted with the mindless drivel he has to act out, so he changes the scripts. When the editors see the strips, they are horrified! Meanwhile, Ralph and Supernympho fly off to be married.
"A lot of damaged minds with warped ideals, like my own, hunger for the great, almighty Ralph. We would go blind without his humble guidance."
-- Benny R. Rubdickie, Comic book staple checker